More Than Just Battles
by Goddess Jeshi
Summary: You know the Smashers. You know they fight, their secret skills, etc. But do you know which one can survive in the sand the longest? A humor tale of 'contests', from the long jump to swimming with sharks! Please read and REVEIW!
1. Test 1: Heads in the Sand

Story by Goddess Jeshi.

Art by… Never mind.

Characters ® Nintendo.

Writing (AKA plot, words, etc.) by Goddess Jeshi.

--; Um… Lesse see… Yeah, that's about it… Oh, Goddess Jeshi ® Goddess Jeshi…

Questions? Comments? Insults? Flame? Anything? Yeah… Scroll down… Select, "Review" … The selector thing is on your left… Then click the stuff… Write it in the pop-up… Thanks. )

"So you've seen them battle… And since I'm a wonderful Goddess, I can see all… and I shall share some…" The Goddess Jeshi began mystically, the white background fading into a beach with palm trees on a deserted looking island. "This is the Life of the Smashers-" The Goddess Jeshi began to turned around while talking, but stopped when she saw the beach. "Darnit! I told them to make sure to get the school scene – I mean… Well, anyway. My Underlings have messed up. Oh yes, they'll be punished… I'll bury them up to their necks in the sand! … Speaking of sand…" Jeshi went out of super-evil mode and into "all-too-sweet" mode.

"We'll be doing some… Um… 'Contests' on this Beach. Every week, you'll gather around to see more than just you're favorite characters killing each other, but using all their other skills to---… Survive." The goddess blabbed on, motioning to the beach. The camera zooms in "So welcome our Smashers… And on to our first contests!"

Mysticaly, Roy, Ganondorf, Young Link, Luigi, Samus, Mr Game & Watch, Marth, Zelda, Captain Falcon, Link, Mario, Pikachu, Pichu, Peach, Ness, Bowser, Mewtwo and Jiigglypuff all showed up.

"Oh, if you're wondering about the Ice Climbers… Well…" Goddess Jeshi trailed off, not making eye-contact to the totally non-noticeable crate that has banging and screaming coming from the inside, floating out to sea.

"Where are we?" Marth questioned. camera zooms in on Marth, then zips over to Roy just in time for his comments.

"Apparently, not were we just were." Roy mumbled.

"I already notice a pattern." Young Link said loudly, and proudly.

"Well, what is it kid?" Mewtwo asked rudely.

"…" There was a silence.

"… That was rude." Young Link mumbled, just as a kid would (well, he _is_ a kid…). "Anyway. All of us compete in the Super Smash Melee-"

"ARG! Another person spoofing / fanficing us! It was enough that Nintendo wanted to through us ALL together into some video game, but then the spoof and fanfictions and –" Ganondorf's complaining was cut of by, who else, Goddess Jeshi.

"If you please give me your attention… Attention here…" She called, clapping her hands. "Everyone, as you may have noticed, you're all the Smashers of-"

"Yeah, yeah."

"Okay… so you did notice. Going on, then. I'm the Goddess Jeshi, and—"

"So you're the reason we're here?"

"What do you-"

"Jeshi, are you a real goddess?"

"I covered that in my profile, now as I was saying –"The Goddess tried to continued on. As more questions were asked, she lost her patience…

Suddenly everyone was up to there necks in sand.

"Listen up, everybody!" The Goddess Jeshi began loudly. "I am the author and I can do whatever I want in this fanfic, so do not question thy! Now, our first contest has already begun… Who can last the longest buried up to their necks in sand? Let's go!"

"It's… So… Hot…" Mumbled Falco.

"You're out, Falco. No talking." The Goddess Jeshi threw him out with a few clicks on her magically there keyboard.

"The last one in the sand wins."

"Wins what?" Pondered Falco aloud.

"…" The Goddess was silent.

"Don't tell me you have no reward!" Gaped Falco.

"… N-nonsense!" Shot the Goddess. "Um… I guess I should tell you more, huh?"

All the little heads sticking out of the sand bobbled a bit, but no one could really nod.

"Okay, then. Our readers (AKA, YOU! Yes, you!) will review (yes… WILL!) and vote someone out. Or vote someone a reward.

"You can vote someone out because they're boring or lost a lot or anything… And you can vote someone for a reward if it fits them. Like if Zelda talks a lot…" Zelda, who had not said a word yet, made a face at this. "You could vote her for the, 'Talkative' reward. We'll give rewards out every now and then… Depends on how many people want to give someone a reward…

"As for you, readers… You can tell this is an interactive story, huh? Well, when you vote… You know the basics. But as for the rewards…  You can make those up. Like… Make up the 'annoying reward' or the 'spooky reward', or even the 'funny reward'… D" The goddess Jeshi finished -or who knows? Maybe she still had more to say. But anyway, she was cut of…- just as all the Pokemon let out their noises, and Mr. Game&Watch beeped, and Samus cried,

"It's too hot!" The Goddess smirked.

"Off with more!" And a few more clicks on the keyboard… Boom, less heads in a sand.

Two Minutes Later

"DARN IT'S TOO FRICKIN' HOT!"

Click, click and POOF

Three Minutes Later

"I can't stand it anymore… Let me out!"

Click, clack and POOF

"Wrong person… ME!"

"Oh, sorry."

Click, click, POOF! The other dude is back. Click, click, POOF! The first dude is out.

One Minute Later

"Thatsitgetmeoutofthisgodforsakenexcuseofapileofsandnow!" Ganondorf yelled, blurring his words together.

"What'd he say?" Asked the Goddess Jeshi, who had begun to read a book.

"He said, I WANT OUT NOW! … That goes for me, too." Mario 'translated'.

So you know how it goes. It took about an hour until it came down to to (Joking… Two.) 'battlers' left.

It was Young Link, who was enjoying the heat as a sand bath, and Bowser, who was used to extreme heat (he's got fireballs and lava and everything in his dudgeons!).

"…" There was no talking.

Young Link seemed content and happy, while Bowser felt like he was in a prison cell. Well, in a way, he was.

"Pass the sunscreen." Whispered Roy to Marth. The people waiting where sunning themselves and relaxing on the beach. It was, after all, white sand, blue water, palm trees ands strong sun.

"Okay, people. Let's call this a tie." The Goddess Jeshi said, who had just finished her book.

"Care to place any votes, Readers?" the Goddess asked coolly.

"THIS IS ALL A DUMB LITTLE PLOY! I SHALL ESCAPE, AND YOU'LL ALL-" Ganondorf yelled in a background.

"Like Ganondorf for most annoying? Ha. Well, see ya next time!"

Next time, on "More Than Battles", we'll be seeing… Who has the longest/farthest jump! Who can run the 40 meter dash the fastest! Who can swim, free style, 2 miles the fastest, with sharks in the water? --- That's what it says… … Well, join us and find out!

_Well, there it is. My first document... I must admit, the ending was poor and this entire chapter took me about an hour to write... So not too well done or anything. Still, please don't be too rough when you reveiw... and please reveiw! THANK YOU!_


	2. Set Up the Stage for Test Two!

_Story by Goddess Jeshi._

_Art by… Never mind._

_Characters ® Nintendo._

_Writing (AKA plot, words, etc.) by Goddess Jeshi._

_Goddess Jeshi ® Goddess Jeshi…_

_:P You lucky dogs! You're getting two chapters on the first day! So you may not have a chance to review it… but I'm gonna post up the second 'test' now just because. :P_

**_Oh, sorry! I forget to mention Kirby, Peach, and a ton of others in the first chapter… Don't worry, he or she or whatever it is, is here!_**

**_In the last chapter, Roy said ""Apparently, not were we just were." He was supposed to said, "Apparently, we're not where we just where." Sorry 'bout that!_**

"This is against my better judgment." Marth stated flatly for the 6th time. As ordered last time… Oh, want a flash back?

Insert amazing and very eye-burning bright white flash here, please.

"Now, you WILL report here this time, this place next week." The Goddess ordered.

"Even if we did come-" (Marth gets a glare from the Goddess) "Um… Where will we go?"

"Oh, good point. There is a plane waiting for the in _Special Stages; Final Destination._" The Goddess Jeshi informed everyone. "See you next week! It's either you risk losing the contest in here, or risk losing your lives out there." The Goddess added, walking off.

Insert a amazing a very bright and eye-burning flash here, NOW.

"But you came, too." Mario pointed out, after his eyes recovered from the 'bright white flash'.

Marth shrugged. "Well, it's that 'Goddess'. I mean, she is the author and said, 'risk your lives'…" Marth trailed off.

They were riding in the plane to the island-beach thing.

"We're here."

The crew got of – Pikachu quick attacking to the ground, Kirby and Jigglypuff floating to the ground, etc. etc. (Pichu trying to quick attack, but zapping themselves and getting dizzy in mid-air, then falling to the ground with a not-so-graceful thump.)

"Is it too late?" Roy whispered to Marth as he walked off the jet.

"Yes, Roy. Now shut up." The Goddess snapped, hearing Roy's comment. "Welcome one, welcome all… and all that blab. Let's get right to it! After all, we're on our second mircosoft word page, and still we havn't started!"

A couple people rolled their eyes, but then they nodded.

"Did you all bring bathing suits?"

That's when everyone froze… At the Goddess' question. _Bathing suits. Why on earth would we need bathing suits?_

"Well, taking your awkward silence as a 'no, you're lovely Goddessness…'" The Goddess Jeshi continued, "I'm hoping I have the right sizes."

Everyone stopped breathing, _again_. _Right sizes! Don't tell me she rented bathing suits for us to use!_

"Hey, hey. We're only swimming with the sharks once, so chill - … Hey, guys?" Everyone cut off their blood circulation as well as their air pipes after they heard, "Swimming with the sharks."

"Hey, you guys go and kill each other! Act a little tougher! Now, for our first contest…" The Goddess moved on to the test… "The Long Jump."

Insert epic gasp here

(In a computer voice) **FIVE MINUTES LATER**

"No, it was 4 minutes and 39 seconds later, but… All the same." Shrugged Peach, who was "floating as she follows", AKA floating while Peach followed the 'Goddess'. They reached it.

"We're here!" Proclaimed the Goddess proudly, raising her arms to show… … More sand.

"Where is, 'here?'" Link asked, insulting the Goddess.

"The darned idiots! They forget the long jump stadium!" The Goddess Jeshi muttered to herself. Then she turned to the rest of the group. "Well, it'll be a few minutes while I type up a good, I mean… Create a good long-jump stadium. Meanwhile, you can do **this**."

Flash of bright light

30 minutes later.

"Tears trickle down my sadden face as my heart throbs… This movie is SO SAD!" Everyone cried. "This Clifford movie is just too depressing!"

The Goddess paid no mind to the cries, fake or real, of the Smashers and hit a few more keys. With a loud POOF , a item appeared.

"So this is the key to our long-jump test, the epic test for being the winner." Marth remarked, looking at the new item floating in mid-air.

Roy didn't even bother to talk around it. "Chalk." He said, staring at the object. "You spent 30 minutes making CHALK."

The Goddess nodded, proudly. "Now we chop it up and sprinkle it around to make our stadium, and then we have our contest! … Anyone, please."

Roy was raising his sword as Zelda blew the chalk up with Din's fire. Carefully catching it, the Goddess Jeshi handed it to Ness.

"I don't want it." Ness said, trying to give it back to the Goddess.

"_Nay, nay_."

"You're a horse?"

"Ness. It means **NO**. Go spread it around and make our field."

"Why me?"

"… Do not question thy Goddess. Now go and hurry!"

Still with much grumbling, Ness ran around and made the "stadium." It was really just a large rectangle. At the end they were closest to, there was about two feet and then another line… They stood there, ran a little and jumped.

"Who do you think can jump 80 feet!" The Smashers commented, shocked by the large rectangle.

"_Nyah, nyah. Nay, nay_." The Goddess brushed off the words. "Anyway, it appears it was much work just getting this to start, sooooo… Next time: The REAL CONTESTS! 'Till then!"

"Does this mean we get a week off?"

"No, you stand here until I finish writing – I mean…"

"? You're a weird goddess…"

"That's it! Up to your neck in sand!"

"Oh, sure. That takes you 2 seconds, but it's half an hour for a piece of chalk!"

"… Silence!"

… _I swear, I didn't plan this to be so bad… Or take so long to have the contest happen… But hey, it's in the same day, right?_


	3. Test 2: Broken Arms in Long Jump, etc

"Yo!" Welcome the Goddess Jeshi.

"'Yo'." Repeated Zelda. "How many goddess say, 'Yo'?"

"All, it's the 'talk'." The Goddess mumbled, and then continued on as the camera zoomed in on her face. "So we're finally doing the three contests: Long jump, um… 40 meter dash, and… Uh…"

"You forget them." Roy stated.

"No! I just… temporarily had a memory loss of the plan because it was delayed… Eh; finally, Swimming With Sharks!" The Goddess Jeshi continued. "So, shall we start with the long jump? You can double jump, use tools, special powers, extra." Peach grinned. She had a good plan for the double jump.

"So, let's begin with… Uh… Mario!"

Mario nodded and went up to the starting point. He jogged in place, getting ready.

"Start whenever you're ready."

Again, Mario nodded and then he ran and jumped; then double-jumped again in midair, then made a fist and soar a little higher like a superhero would. Frankly, Mario went up pretty high… But he didn't go very far.

"… 6 feet." Stated the Goddess, seeming disappointed in Mario. "Of all the Mushroom Kingdom games I've bought… Er… Well, I always knew Lugi was the jumper. Lugi, you're up!"

Lugi, like Mario, nodded and ran up to the square. He looked at it a bit, then jumped up about ten feet in the air, and came soaring down at a three foot distance.

"Mam-ah-me-a…" Mumbled Mario, shaking his head.

"… Next, Dr. Mario!" Dr. Mario came running up, and didn't even stop for the square. He jumped, double jumped, and fist-jumped, just like Mario. Expect he kept going, and got a distances of ten.

The Goddess smiled. "Current Winner: Dr. Mario with Ten. Next, go Bowser!"

Bowser shook his head as he walked slowly up, each step making loud thumps… So Jumping wasn't his thing, maybe? … It wasn't.

"Four feet…" The Goddess Jeshi didn't look upset at this, so he had met her expectations. "Finishing for the Mushroom Kingdom Clan, you're up… Princess Peach!"

Peach smiled and quickly hovered over to the starting box. She landed to refuel her floating power, and then went up again. Then Peach quickly soared over the box. A few seconds later, her ability was wearing off. Peach took out her umbrella and floated down to an amazing score of 17 feet.

"Nice work, Peach. Next we'll do… Yoshi!" Yoshi excitedly ran up to the box, then he stepped on air and climbed up about 15 feet. What comes up must come down, at a total distance of ten feet. "Not bad…" The Goddess Jeshi said, marking it on her clipboard. "Next we'll do… Zelda Tribe!"

Link rolled his eyes at the names the Goddess Jeshi was giving. Then Young Link was called up. He jumped, double jumped, and use the _Deku leaf_ to float down. (The _Deku leaf_ is a giant leaf Y. Link uses as a parachute.) He got a good 17 feet, which made him happy.

It went as follows. Link scored a 16 and a fractured arm; he used the hook shot, and fractured him arm on impact. Zelda, who did this as Sheik, got a 13.

"All right! We have a tie of Peachy and Kid Link." The Goddess announced. Peach and Young Link didn't look happy at what she called them, but they were still happy they won.

"Now, for the 20 meter dash!"

"… You said it was 40 meters early, and –"

"Sush! Now it's 20 meters! So it's a race from that palm tree," The Goddess pointed to a palm tree with a monkey that was throwing down coconuts, "To that giant rock!" The Goddess Jeshi pointed to a rock with an arm chair on it. "I'll welcome the winners on it." The Goddess added, seeing the weird looks at the arm chair.

"So, line up at the palm tree…" Everyone went by it, trying to keep away from the coconuts. "and BEGIN!" At the word of "Begin", the monkey began to throw bombs!

"Talk about a rough start!" Fox mumbled, riding the explosion of the bomb blowing.

The race was pretty short and simple… The Goddess had just sat down on her arm chair (:P) when the winner arrived. It was… Yes, indeed… _Pikachu_.

Everyone else seemed upset by it, but Pichu was as happy as a button (how happy are buttons, anyway?) to see it's cousin win.

"Next is swimming with sharks! Of course, you don't really swim with the sharks… You swim 3 laps in the water, with one shark in there to add some gusto." Said the Goddess Jeshi.

"But I've moved this to the end of the whole set of contests, because I want the most people alive for the other tests!" The Goddess continued, happily. Everyone else seemed purely shocked she would say _that_.

"Sooooo… That means to you, see you next time!"

_Let's see… Notices… Notices… Notes… anything?_

_Well, first… -- PLEASE REVIEW! If you read something, you are_

_Hereby entitled to review it! Or at least… Alert it or favorite _

_It if it's really good and you're too lazy to review (Not that this it.)_

_Second. Um…Well thanks for reading! And…_

_A special thanks to __Megami Murasaki__ (who's name_

_Changes, so this user may not exist tomorrow…) _

_For reviewing, favoring, and alerting._

_Thanks to you for reading._

_And a thanks in advance for reviewing!_

_**(And you WILL review! 97 hits and 1 review doesn't cut it!)**_

_By the by, I know this is a short chapter..._

_And it took awhile to get up..._

_So sue me! I had uploading troubles! (Like always... sigh)_


	4. Setting Up Stage for Test Three, Part 1

_The rain… I can't see… I'm deaf, lost in the white sound of sloshing waters. The hard drops pound against my back. I have been standing here, arched, for what seems like forever. I no longer care about me. I just want… I just want… To get the contests going and finally get the next chapter up!!_

"Hello and welcome to – finally! – another chapter of More than just Battles. We're currently waiting for the contestants to show up for the next set of contests…" A few drops of thick, muddy rain crashed against the Goddess' face, barely missing her eyes. "Ugh! Who knew it rained where it was so tropical?! I wanted a sunny Hawaii to hold these exotic contests on!!"

Heaving a deep breath of annoyance, the Goddess continued, the camera focusing on the soaking palm trees. "This is wrong! W-R-O-N-G!! WRONG!" The rain washed out most traces of the actual words she was saying, but the tone gave more than a hint of the meaning.

"Fine! I shall go… And find the victims-I mean stupid contestants!" The Goddess stormed off, heading to the magical transportation circle that was strangely there exactly when you needed it. But instead of praising the power of fan fiction, the Goddess complained about the 'people not showing up!!' and 'they promised they would!!' and 'I'm so going to skin them alive!' and 'Maybe I should up the rating for a little more violence!!' and…

………………………………………………………..

The jazz music played and the beat was more than catchy. Fox was dancing carelessly, with a fine woman named Foxy. The two had been talking all night, enjoying the party together-SLAM.

"ALL RIGHT, wise guy! You can't outfox me!" Thunderous footsteps that made it seem like a Goddess really_ was_ anger banged and crashed onto the wood floors. The poor party host was probably hoping their insurance covered dented floors by mad Goddesses. But back to me, I mean the point… The Goddess was mad, and she had found Fox.

"Err-excuse me a minute, Foxy…" Fox tried to casually slip away. Foxy didn't look to happy, even though she was a kind, forgiving soul.

"Why are you here?" Whispered Fox to the Goddesses, whom, if you had not guessed, was here.

"Because you weren't there!" She shot back through also gritted teeth. She meant he wasn't there – there meaning he wasn't where she was, where she was being where he was supposed to be, which was where he promised to be, which was…

Fox made a face, "We had to be there this week?" He said.

"Duh!" The Goddesses almost growled back, shaking with furry, wrath and classic anger.

"Pichu said we didn't have to –" Fox began, but the Goddess cut him off, "- and Pichu is gonna pay!"

As the Goddess dragged away Fox, who was yelling his apologizes to Foxy, she began to think more and more…

_How can something so cute as Pichu do something so evil as make the show late?_

………………………………………….

More any minute! Hold on – this is just something for you to read while I get the rest ready. Try refreshing the page!


	5. Setting Up Stage for Test Three, Part 2

Author's beforehand notes: Heheheh… I was going to load the rest over the chapter, so that's why I said "refresh" and all. But you all commented so fast! I just posted up some of it so you would know I was continuing. But since you can only commented once per chapter, I'm going to just post the rest up here. Please forgive my lack of chapters, and enjoy the finish off… _More Than Just Battles: Setting up the Stage for Test 3! –Part 2_

After using her awesome Goddesses' powers, the Goddesses located Pichu. Pichu was snoozing gleefully in it's poke'ball. The Goddess grabbed it, and threw it as hard as she could onto the ground. The poke'ball got chipped, and out came… Chikarita.

"Pichu! Why on earth ---"

"Chiku?"

"--- … Are you green?"

"Chiku chik?"

"… You aren't Pichu, are you?"

"Chi." In addition to the verbal answer, which the Goddess had no idea what it meant, Chikarita shook it's head. It's leaf swished from side to side… The Goddess felt an urge to grab it, but she somehow resisted with the thought, "next time, next time…".

"Thanks. Well…" The Goddess talked to what it thought was a green lump, not taking her budging eyes of the leaf, "Do you know where we might find the leaf?"

"Chi?"

"Where might we find Pichu?" The Goddess didn't take her eyes of the leaf still, sensing Chikarita cock it's head.

"Chiku." The green blob swished –again!- it's leaf in the south direction.

"Thanks." The Goddess, eyes unmoving, walked around, feeling the floor for Chikurita's poke'ball. Finding it, the Goddess turned her body to face Chikurita. For the first time she took her eyes of the leaf and looked at the dented poke'ball. "Um… Sorry 'bout that… Return!" With a childish stance and also childish heroic pride, the Goddess thrust the poke'ball, in hand, at Chikarita. The poke'mon flowed into red, and the red energy flew into the poke'ball.

"…Wow." The goddess breathed, looking at the poke'ball.

"Come on! Let's head south already." Fox urged. He had been crabby ever since he had to leave Foxy and the party.

"Don't rush a Goddess!! … Come on, let's go already!" Two-faced, the Goddess rushed the group onward, they darted south…

…………………………….

After reaching "South", a continent from no where (Maybe Goddesses' home video game?), our group discovered that it was indeed-ly… Covered in Pichus!

"Pichu land! This is hopeless!" Fox grumbled, throwing his arms up in despair.

"No, it's the South Land, not Pichu Land!" A high voice…

"But it's covered in Pichu's!" Fox stamped his foot and stomped the other one. What's the difference, anyway?

"HOLD YOUR FRICKIN' TEMPER!!" An _angry_ high voice.

"…Pichu." The Goddess bent down and studied the electric rat. Or show-stealing brat!

"'Sup?" The lively little critter turned to the Goddess, casually.

"How come you told Fox that the…" The Goddess stumbled.

"The…" Pichu carried on, pressing the Goddess to continue.

"The… The… The meeting or show or whatever wasn't on today!" The Goddess jumped up and down, stomping and stamping BOTH her feet at the same time. Talent. ;P

"HOLD YOUR FRIGGIN' TEMPER!!" A REALLY angry high voice of a bratty show stealing electric rat called Pichu on a continent called South. Yesh.

"Now then…" After recovery… "The whatsa?" The Pichu questioned. Fox tiptoed up to the Goddess, grabbed her Holy Shoulder, and pulled Her Holy Self away.

"What?!" The Goddess snapped, yanking her shoulder away.

"Maybe this isn't the same Pichu…" Fox whispered in a low, private eye type voice.

"… Oh." The Goddess stared down. There was a silence. Fox took it was a maturation – a new respect being born… "Oh well! It'll work! Come on, let's go kidnap it and round everyone else up!"

Fox groaned.

……………………………

After a little while of rounding people up… Or TRYING…

"All right I'm sick of finding people!" the Goddess announced. "I'll just use my awesome goddess powers to summon them here."

"Why didn't you do that in the beginning?!" Fox complained, in a mix of anger and… Lot s of other emotions, like relief.

"Where would the plot go?!"

"Texas!" Pichu shouted out.

……………………………………

"Well, now the show can start. Cheer up." Roy said, trying to cheer up the Goddess. Everyone was pretty miserable that they didn't have the day off.

"Yeah, but there is one thing that's still bugging me."

"What?"

"I never did find out who caused it…"

_Meanwhile…_

In a small cave decorated with 3 golden triangles stacked upon each other, there was an evil King who was laughing his head off. "Muawhuahwa! Now NO ONE will show up! She'll be ruined! It's over! They will all thank me! I'LL BE KING OF ALL THEIR VIDEO GAME AND MOVIE AND STUFF REALMS!! Muahwuahwua!!"

… Ah, but who else?

After hand notes: Do you know how hard it is to type up "the Goddess" every time you want to mention a character who gets mentioned a lot? It can be a pain. XD … Oh well. I hope you guys enjoy reading this! I'll try to get back into practice and make things funnier… And get them up more, too. Thank you for reading! Please comment!

I'm sorry it takes so long to get up new chapters. We had no internet for about a week, so even once I finished I couldn't upload. But no excuses. I shall try to get more more often!


	6. Award Ceremony and Such: 1

"Welcome back to More Than Just Battles!" The Goddess winked at the camera, which was giving her a close-up. "As always, I start off welcoming you and then the camera zooms in on me or something… I really need to get new materiel for openings." She muttered to herself. "And you know? I stopped saying, 'Goddess Jeshi' and started to refer to myself as 'The Goddess'. Did anyone noticed that? I didn't up until now…….."

"She sure talks a lot, huh?" Roy muttered.

"You talk a lot too!" The Goddess/Goddess Jeshi complained, flinging her arms, "You talk the most!"

"I wonder why…" Roy rolled his eyes openly, since the Goddess/Goddess Jeshi was only seeing his back.

The Goddess/Goddess Jeshi scoffed, "I could just give Marth your lines. Everyone seems to like him more, anyway." She strolled up to Marth, who was taller than her, and jabbed at him with her finger. "I don't see why." She grumbled, muttering something about 'Marth not being hot' and 'Roy is cuter' and…. (Yes, this is based of something in real life, an actually situation where my friends think Marth is hot! Gasp! He's an ugly doofus, for crying out loud!)

"Can we just get on with it?" Captain Falcon suggested, annoyed.

"Whoa, Cpt. Falco!" The Goddess/Goddess Jeshi gasped, "That's, like, your first line for this whole thing! Which brings me to the point… Narration mode, please, so I can end these stupid and limited quotes…"

It has come to my attention that I have been majorly leaving out some characters and using others lots. For example, I tend to use Roy more than Samus.

"Samus who?" Yeah, I know. Sorry.

I shall try to get the characters more into my spoof/fanfic/contest-thing-ma-bobber-plopper-itsy-bitsy-yellow-polka-dot-bikini (haven't you heard that song?).

Like Samus, Captain Falcon, Mewotwo, Jigglypuff, Mr. Game and Watch, and a few others…. And then, I shall just try to get down on other characters and give characters that are semi-left out a bigger role.

Unless, of course, someone objects.

(dun dun dun daaa!)

"All right!" The Goddess/Goddess Jeshi cheered, "Now that the boring stuff is done, onto---"

Not done.

"I-it isn't?" The Goddess/Goddess Jeshi whimpered.

Nope.

"B-but I don't wanna just stand around here and listen to you narrate, whoever you are!" She issued her pathiec complaint.

Think of them.

Whatever that thing was, it motioned (somehow) to the characters forgotten… Like Yoshi, etc. The Goddess/Goddess Jeshi flinched, "Ummm… Lesson learned?" She tried, feeling not the least bit guilty but still just wanting her stardom back (of course, no one has to know that…).

It wasn't to teach you a lesson.

But very well.

You can do this next part.

"Yay!" The Goddess/Goddess Jeshi jumped for joy—

You haven't been very funny lately.

"but—"

Work on it.

"I'm trying—"

Not hard enough.

"I'll—"

Just… Be funnier.

"I promise—"

Be funnier for the award ceremonies and the other stuff!

The Goddess ran over, grabbed Ness, brought him back, and pressed his "up arrow" button (the taunt button).

"Okay." He nodded at the screen, agreeing for the Goddess. After his service was done, the Goddess/Goddess Jeshi promptly threw him behind her and beamed. "All right, onto the award stuff!"

"Yaay." The group cheered heartless.

_Man, I just can't be funny!! GAAAHHH!!_

_(Not like I ever was… Sweat drop for me!)_

"First award goes to… Kirby! It's the…" (pause for drum roll and clapping)

Everyone begins to clap, Kirby fills up with air and soars up in glee—

"—Sexy Award!" The Goddess/Goddess Jeshi finished announcing.

--All of the clapping stopped, and Kriby popped and fell to the ground, seemingly dead.

"…Wow, the first contestant to leave. But what a cruel way to go…" Mewtwo remarked, oddly enough (ha! I used him!).

"Agreed." Samus (see?! I can do it!) nodded, both of them just staring down at the corpse (?).

Suddenly, Kriby flew up again, glowing with light. It's theme song began to play as it celebrated in the lone skies…

"I'm too sexy for my shirt, I'm too sexy for my shirt, too sexy, too…"

And then everyone dies and happy – err rather – horrible, painful, ear-burning death and all go to well I can't say because of the kiddies out there. Muahwua.

--After A Short Detour to the Hospital—

"Now then…" Marth coughed.

"continuing…" Fox didn't make eye contact with Kriby. It (gender..? he?) was still beaming.

"Yes, continuing." The Goddess/Goddess Jeshi agreed. "The next award goes to…"

(This time the drum roll is here, not later!)

"Fox!"

(Everyone cheers, and Fox looks have asleep. Suddenly, he is abruptly waken up by the noise. He starts cussing and threatening to shoot him if they don't shut up and let him rest… Then he finds it's his award and mumbles some apologies and goes up to get it……)

_How come that was in (these things)? And who am I, anyway? Am I just the centered narration voice or something? Jeez…_

"For…"

(Another drumroll?)

"Being Absent! Technically, everyone of those darned things that take part in the contests were absent that day, but heck, Fox gets it! He was the first one found, too." The Goddess heaves a groan, "I _still_ never found out who did it."

There is coughing heard from the crowd, and the Goddess/Goddess Jeshi could make out the word 'Ganon' in it, but she didn't know anyone named 'Ganon'. It reminded her of Ganondorf, but it had to be a different person. She ignored it, just waiting until she could get her sweet revenge… Someday. But it would still come! She--- okay, returning to the story before I go crazy…

"And another award going to Dramaya M. Murasaki—" The Goddess pauses for clapping, but none comes. After a few minutes, the "too sexy" Kriby began to clap. The Goddess did a bow, and continued, "For being the best reader out there! It's sort of a pen name update thing. I love all of you readers!" The Goddess/Goddess Jeshi began to blow air kisses to the camera, but abrupt sneezes, coughs, and choking sounds snapped her back to the award ceremony.

"Well, anyway. If I could, I would mention all of you beloved readers in this. Thanks to you all! You're what keeps me going. And I'm afraid I better end this now, 'cause it's one screwed up chapter and we need to start fresh!"

The Happy Ever After!

As credits roll, Kriby gives us a unwanted encore… Run for your lives or the sexy Kirby will get you! How about heading for the "Review" button?

_A/N: Uh… Crazy chapter? I beseech your forgiveness? Did I even use that word right?_


End file.
